Being Thankful

I wrote a thing.  A thing about what I am thankful for.  Let's face it -- I'm way too lazy for those daily Facebook posts.  Those are better left to someone more consistent than myself.  But random, stream-of-consciousness free-writing?  I can do that ... even if it isn't pretty, it's out there.

Enjoy.  Or don't.  It's more for me than it is for anyone else, anyway.

Thankful

I am thankful for my brain

I am thankful for my amazing, beautiful, functional body

I am thankful for every tiny bit of love that comes my way

I am thankful for my warm, fuzzy, monkey slippers

I am thankful for the care and love of my family

I am thankful for my sense of humor

I am thankful for my family's sense of humor

I am thankful for my brother, who is in many ways my best friend

I am thankful for my mother, who is in many ways my best friend

I am thankful for the trees in my backyard

I am thankful that I have a backyard

I am thankful for my two amazing, incredible, beautiful children who surprise me each day
I am thankful for my incredible niece and nephew who bring me so much joy when I see them

I am thankful that they are all healthy and capable and, frankly, the best ever ever ever ever

I am thankful for art (all kinds) – both the expression and appreciation of

I am thankful for those who care more than I know, who I often fail to mention, and perhaps even take for granted

I am thankful for my teachers

I am thankful for my education

I am thankful for my renewed passion for learning

I am thankful for my personal progress and growth throughout the past two years

I am thankful for the people who have helped me in that growth and progress – you know who you are

I am thankful for no-pants dance time

I am thankful for my health (that which I have)

I am thankful for medical care to aid with the parts that aren't as healthy

I am thankful for “enough to make ends meet,” even if it takes a lot of help to have it

I am thankful for my creativity

I am thankful for my voice
I am thankful for my beauty, even if I can't always see it – I know it's there waiting for me to find it again

I am thankful for leggings that make my ass look great, even if I refuse to wear them in public

I am thankful for my house

I am thankful for all the conveniences that it holds which make what could be a much more difficult life just that much easier

I am thankful for the internet and social media (because let's just be honest here)

I am thankful for the incredible generosity of others when I have been in need

I am thankful for the example they set; for others, and for myself

I am thankful that I got as much time with my dad as I did before he passed away – it wasn't always easy or perfect, but I learned a lot from him and the legacy he left behind

I am thankful for the experiences that present themselves to me which challenge me in new ways … even when they scare the hell out of me

I am thankful for the things and people which make me laugh – the laugh where I feel like I can't breathe

I am thankful for adventures, of which I have had more in the past year than probably in the past decade

I am thankful that there are plenty more adventures ahead of me

I am thankful for this gift which is my life

I am thankful that even my most challenging frustrations are only temporary

I am thankful for love

I am thankful for hope

I am thankful for contentment – even if it isn't consistent







I am thankful for you. The person who cares or is curious enough to want to peer into my life and see these pieces of me – these tiny flickers and giant floods of light that splash over my life and allow me to see all the colors of my world.

THE ACADEMIC - "Hazel Tells LaVerne"

Poetry analysis questions and responses on "Hazel Tells LaVerne" by local Ithacan poet Katharyn Howd Machan.

2. What creates the poem's humor? How does Hazel's use of language reveal her personality? Is her treatment of the frog consistent with her character?

In many ways I believe that the language use itself is what creates the poem's humor. Also the absurdity of bringing a magical creature/fairy tale element into a very “real world” setting. It's very specific – not just a hotel or a motel, but a Howard Johnson's. It stirs up images of some ultra-70s teal and orange building with rooms that smell of cigarettes. It's a very realistic setting which is a stark contrast against the whimsy of the magical frog “prince”.

Hazel's language use gives us the impression that she is uneducated, but independent and (for lack of a better word) “sassy”. The use of “sohelpmegod” without spaces or “well I screams” … or the fact that the entire poem reads like one giant run-on sentence lends to its colloquial nature.

Hazel's treatment of the frog is consistent with her character – and it is in line with two different interpretations that I've considered for this poem. The first is that Hazel is an independent woman who rejects the notion of a “fairy tale” because she is a reasonable and practical woman – and that she is unwilling to resign herself to a fate that exists only as a relation to a man. The second interpretation is that because of her lot in life, a simple housekeeper leading a terribly UN-glamorous existence, Hazel doesn't believe that she is worthy or capable of being a “princess” and that the frog MUST be trying to sell her a lie because something like that happening to someone like her would be impossible. (“rags to riches”, low-class to high class, etc.) Hazel feels trapped by her social status.

4. What is the theme? Is it conveyed through denotative or connotative language?

I have two different interpretations as to what the theme might be. It's either about a woman feeling empowered to reject the notion of a fairy tale or an existence that only is available to her through the offering of a “prince”/man, or it is about a woman who feels trapped within her social class and cannot believe that her becoming a princess could ever even be a possibility – so she assumes that the frog is only trying to serve his own desires to be kissed in exchange for nothing.

Machan's works in feminist publications and interest in women's rights and feminism would support her desire to write about this topic with either interpretation.

6. Comment on any other poems by this author which might provide insight into this one.

In the poem, “Ada Macomber: Redwing, 1888,” a similar situation about a woman feeling trapped by her social class and circumstances is presented.

Here on Maple Street, civilized

high white walls and proper

doors with knockers shaped

like foxes, I entertain

friends, acquaintances, skirts

full and corsets carefully

laced, smiles the curve

of husbands' success. Who

am I to widen out my

boundaries, embrace a man

of loam and seed? He

says my name, the one

I never dare pronounce where

silk dulls tongue: I

dance within his gaze like light

gone wild, new sun ray swaying

blue to gold to blue again

before dark calls, before

time becomes a way of staying

distant, lifeless, pure.

(Machan, Louisiana Literature)

Though the speaker in this poem is in the opposite social class, she faces a similar problem about feeling stuck within the confines of her “place,” socially. I think that this is still a problem that women face in current society. I think it's something that men encounter as well, but in many ways the social expectation of a woman is to “dance” or “tiptoe” around a man – or that her identity will be defined by her relationship or usefulness to a man.

In looking for another poem to compare, I read through several of Machan's poems, and what I found most fascinating about them is that they cover varying topics about the human experience and that, many times, each speaker has a very distinct personality and characterization. It speaks to her creativity that she is able to use such varying yet distinguishable “voices” within her poems.

And I loved reading the poetry of someone who is from our area and takes such pride in living in Ithaca. It was really inspiring!

Works Cited

Machan, Katharyn Howd. “Hazel Tells LaVerne”. The Bedford Introduction to Literature. Ed. Michael Meyer. 9th ed. Boston: Bedford, 2012. 608. Print.

Machan, Katharyn Howd, “Ada Maycomber: Redwing, 1888”. Louisiana Literature. 27.1 (2010): 80. Humanities Source. Web. 17 Oct. 2013.

THE ACADEMIC - Ode on a Grecian Urn

This week in our Literature class, we began studying poetry.  I was apprehensive at first, because it is something that I have notoriously disliked and also been quite terrible at.  However, I've had a really excellent experience with it this time around, and within this post you will find my responses to some discussion questions that I chose to cover for my assignment.

If you haven't read Ode on a Grecian Urn by John Keats, here is your chance:

Arthur Quiller-Couch, ed. 1919. The Oxford Book of English Verse: 1250–1900.

John Keats. 1795–1821

625. Ode on a Grecian Urn

THOU still unravish'd bride of quietness,
Thou foster-child of Silence and slow Time,
Sylvan historian, who canst thus express
A flowery tale more sweetly than our rhyme:
What leaf-fringed legend haunts about thy shape	5
Of deities or mortals, or of both,
In Tempe or the dales of Arcady?
What men or gods are these? What maidens loth?
What mad pursuit? What struggle to escape?
What pipes and timbrels? What wild ecstasy?	10
Heard melodies are sweet, but those unheard
Are sweeter; therefore, ye soft pipes, play on;
Not to the sensual ear, but, more endear'd,
Pipe to the spirit ditties of no tone:
Fair youth, beneath the trees, thou canst not leave	15
Thy song, nor ever can those trees be bare;
Bold Lover, never, never canst thou kiss,
Though winning near the goal—yet, do not grieve;
She cannot fade, though thou hast not thy bliss,
For ever wilt thou love, and she be fair!	20
Ah, happy, happy boughs! that cannot shed
Your leaves, nor ever bid the Spring adieu;
And, happy melodist, unwearièd,
For ever piping songs for ever new;
More happy love! more happy, happy love!	25
For ever warm and still to be enjoy'd,
For ever panting, and for ever young;
All breathing human passion far above,
That leaves a heart high-sorrowful and cloy'd,
A burning forehead, and a parching tongue.	30
Who are these coming to the sacrifice?
To what green altar, O mysterious priest,
Lead'st thou that heifer lowing at the skies,
And all her silken flanks with garlands drest?
What little town by river or sea-shore,	35
Or mountain-built with peaceful citadel,
Is emptied of its folk, this pious morn?
And, little town, thy streets for evermore
Will silent be; and not a soul, to tell
Why thou art desolate, can e'er return.	40
O Attic shape! fair attitude! with brede
Of marble men and maidens overwrought,
With forest branches and the trodden weed;
Thou, silent form! dost tease us out of thought
As doth eternity: Cold Pastoral!	45
When old age shall this generation waste,
Thou shalt remain, in midst of other woe
Than ours, a friend to man, to whom thou say'st,
'Beauty is truth, truth beauty,—that is all
Ye know on earth, and all ye need to know.'	50

http://www.bartleby.com/101/625.html

And here are my responses to the discussion questions:

2. How is the happiness in stanza III related to the assertion in lines 11-12 that “Heard melodies are sweet, but those unheard are sweeter”?
   
   This line refers to the assertion that the “song” being played by the “fair youth” can only be seen and not heard – and is therefore romanticized in the mind of the person viewing the art because it can be anything that they want it to be.
   
   “Not to the sensual ear, but, more endeared, Pipe to the spirit ditties of no tone ...” (Meyer, 623)
   
   
   It is about the song transcending the sense of “hearing” (as it obviously cannot be heard because it is only a visual depiction of music) and it is being “played” straight through to the core/soul/spirit of the onlooker.
   
   However, the “reality” of this thought is paradoxical, because a song that is “unheard” is not even really a song, is it? The sound (or song) cannot be “sweeter than” anything if it is, in fact, nothing. This paradox illustrates the contemplative, philosophical tone of the poem which questions and contrasts art vs. life, or the philosophy of art vs. reality. (Brooklyn.cuny.edu)
   
   Keats himself suffered a lot of difficulty and emotional trauma in his very short life, so it is very possible that contemplating these overly-joyous images on the urn causes a certain amount of resentment within Keats, causing him to reflect on the images and compare his own personal experiences/reality with his perception of the figures' reality.
   The happiness in stanza III is related to this line because it is also paradoxical when in the context of the entire stanza. Keats talks about the happiness of the images, but also talks about their stagnation. Keats uses the happiness as hyperbole, almost like sarcasm, to discredit the true happiness and beauty of the images.

2. What is the difference between the world depicted on the urn and the speaker's world?

The world depicted on the urn is a joyous celebration with music and love – all positivity. We all know that life is not always like that, but there is a phenomenon about memory that causes us to always try to preserve our most positive memories and experiences. Have you ever thought about how individuals and families preserve their memories through photos? Birthdays, weddings, parties, vacations … all the “happiest” moments of our lives. The same principle has been applied through art in the past – and specifically in this instance.

Keats almost seems offended by this artistic “misrepresentation” of reality; so he compares it to his own reality and also points out many of life's beauties that the figures will never be able to experience. The whole poem seems like a way to assert that his own life (though riddled with trauma) is just as beautiful as the one depicted on the urn, if not more so because it is real.

7. What do the last lines of the poem mean? “Beauty is truth, truth beauty – that is all Ye know on Earth, and all ye need to know.”

My interpretation of this line is actually that the speaker believes that this art in particular is “a friend to man” because it is selling us a beautiful lie. The line itself reaffirms the “truth” of the statement with its use of the word “truth” itself – but I believe that is a purposeful overstatement of the word in order to emphasize the pieces of truth that the statement lacks.

The “lie” is that beauty is all that we will experience on Earth and that it is all we need to know, but that lie serves the purpose of keeping our life worth living. Our ability as human beings to remember the good times that we have in life and emphasize them as much as possible (same thought as the family photos previously mentioned) while doing our best to learn from our tragedies and traumas is what keeps life being “worth” living. It is a function of survival to maintain our mental health.

So, we can appreciate the beauty of the images of this piece of art to let us remember a beautiful part of life – but I believe that Keats' perspective is that, though it serves a purpose, this is a hollow and empty experience if that is all we see life as being (“Cold pastoral”). The pain of reality and the spectrum of the human experience is what emphasizes life's true beauty.


Works Cited:

"Ode on a Grecian Urn" "Ode on a Grecian Urn" N.p., 13 Feb. 2009. Web. 26 Sept. 2013. http://academic.brooklyn.cuny.edu/english/melani/cs6/urn.html

Keats, John. The Bedford Introduction to Literature. Ed. Michael Meyer. 9th ed. Boston: Bedford, 2012. 623-624. Print.

THE ACADEMIC: Review - An Evening with Dan O'Shannon

As a part of our course for Fundamentals of Speech (Public Speaking--*groan*), we were asked to watch a public speech and write up a review about it.  Last week, Executive Producer of Modern Family (and writer on such shows as: Cheers, Fraiser, and Newhart) Dan O'Shannon came to visit and give a little taste of what it is like being in television, being passionate about writing, and chasing dreams.

An Evening with Dan O'Shannon

     Executive Producer for the hit television series Modern Family, Dan O'Shannon, has assembled quite the resume in his near-30 years of experience as a producer, television writer, and editor. In a recent visit to the Ithaca College campus, O'Shannon spoke as the 17^th lecturer of the Park Distinguished Visitor Series. Given his background in sitcom writing and his experience in the T.V. biz, I expected to hear about writing strategies, navigating the entertainment industry, and of course maybe hear some funny anecdotes about his personal experiences. I certainly was not disappointed – O'Shannon engaged the audience in a way that was informative, entertaining, and motivating.

     The format of the lecture, however, was most unexpected. After Associate Professor Jack Powers briefed the audience on some of O'Shannon's previous accomplishments, he informed us that this lecture would be interview-style, with Powers asking questions and then allowing O'Shannon to respond. Powers himself seemed a bit awkward during the introduction, possibly being thrown off my O'Shannon's many witty interjections. But, I couldn't quite shake the feeling of Powers flaunting his friendship with O'Shannon like one giant, self-serving name-drop, which was quite distracting.  In contrast, O'Shannon seemed genuine, confident, and motivated to deliver his message to the audience.

     Yet given the format of the lecture, finding the core of that message was somewhat difficult. The “interview-style” presented similarly to a podcast played out on stage, with Powers asking questions and O'Shannon giving lengthy, anecdotal responses that felt like mini-speeches in their own right. So, while it's difficult to pinpoint a particular thesis, there are certainly themes present throughout O'Shannon's responses. But, what I took away most from this lecture is: chase what inspires you.

     The first question asked was, “How old were you when you knew you wanted to write for television?,” which transitioned into what felt like the 'origin story' of a character. Inspired by a speaker at a school assembly at the age of 8, and not what he would deem “naturally funny,” O'Shannon started “playing” with comedy in an experimental, “Wow-kid-you're-trying-too-hard” way that I found very relatable. About a decade later, things began to click and he moved to California, where he crashed on a friend's couch and honed his writing skills. He spoke of his commitment and dedication to the craft; writing and meticulously formatting spec scripts on a broken, manual typewriter. He stressed that, in order to be successful, it is important that you make sure that you're putting forth quality material – don't be lazy, and do it the right way even when it's a challenge.

     When O'Shannon entered the lecture hall, I overheard him comment to Powers on the size of the crowd. But, despite any nerves that may have caused, O'Shannon's presence was warm, charismatic, and comfortable. He engaged the audience in a way that was both commanding of attention yet down-to-earth and approachable. His voice was dynamic, and though he was seated, he still told his stories in a way which was entirely captivating.

     Throughout the entertaining anecdotes, there was a sprinkling of solid advice for writers and those looking to enter the television industry. He spoke about remembering the things that aren't necessarily funny at the time, because the things that are the funniest and most memorable down the road are likely the things which were mortifying when they happened. He talked about working with actors, children, the collaborative process between a group of writers, and his personal theory about comedy – that it is a landscape that should be a place of experimentation and manipulating variables to see what works, and what doesn't.

     The main lecture portion closed with O'Shannon speaking about the “power” of writing, which made for an appropriate and memorable close. He spoke of the ability to jot down some squiggles on paper, to release your feelings out into the world, and to have someone else read them and feel something. Writing is a special skill that has resonance and permanence in our world. You can have a conversation with someone you will never meet or speak to, and you can share yourself with the world, which is a truly beautiful sentiment.

     Afterward, O'Shannon fielded several questions from the audience. His responses echoed the general sentiments of his lecture, and reinforced the point of chasing that which inspires you – and staying connected to the things which you are passionate about. Overall, there were plenty of memorable moments to take away. And while there were not many points of controversy or drama, he was passionate about what he was saying– and that is infectious, and something that will stay with me for a long time.

THE ACADEMIC: Social Psychology Journal Assignment

I wanted to share this assignment with the world because, firstly, it got a perfect grade which I was super-excited about, and secondly, because I think that it is a common occurrence, and maybe someone out there will relate to it and feel something.

As a preface, I will paste the criteria for the assignment here, as most of the poor transitions in the final assignment are due to having to address all of the individual questions listed within a word count.

Journal #3:

Describe an aspect of your social identity (gender/race/ethnic group/ socioeconomic status/sexual orientation/weight etc.) that you believe has caused you to be the target of prejudice in some significant area of your life (i.e.: home or school or workplace). If you do not believe this has ever happened to you, then pick a friend or family member who has had this happen to them (ask your mom or dad for example). Try to pick just one in order to focus your answer.

Briefly describe both the aspect of identity and the situation(s) that made you/the person in question feel they were treated differently. Even if you have lots of situations, try to focus on a couple of really important ones in your life.

       Address these questions from chapter 6:

Was there a stereotype being used by the person treating you differently? if so, what was the stereotype? What type of discrimination was shown in the way you/the person in question were treated? Was there tokenism?   Do you think that those who displayed the prejudice were aware of (explicit) the prejudice they displayed, or was it subtle (implicit)? Why?

How do you think the attitudes of the people engaging in the discrimination were formed? Do you think they acquired their prejudice through social learning? 

Could their self-esteem have been threatened, could they have felt they were competing for resources, or was it a case of social categorization? Why do you think this?

       Answer these questions referring to material in chapter 4:

Was this aspect of your social identity important to you or less important? Is it an aspect of your identity that you usually only think about in a certain context? If so, what contexts made this identity noticeable to you (salient) and in what contexts did you tend to not think about that aspect of your identity? Did the differential treatment cause you try to hide or distance yourself from that aspect of your identity? Or did it cause the identity to become even more self-defining as a way of rebelling against the differential treatment? How does this match up with what the textbook says about these two ways of reacting?

Did the treatment you/the person in question received affect other aspects of your self identity (for example, the possible selves you envisioned, your self-esteem, self-efficacy, self-ideal discrepancy or the types of people you chose to use for social comparisons)? Be specific about why. How does this relate to what the textbook says about these aspects of self-identity?

Did you make an attribution that you were treated differently because of prejudice? Did you attribute this to be prejudice isolated to this specific situation or a prejudice that would occur in many situations? How did this affect your well-being? How does this match up with what the textbook says about these types of attributions and their affect on well-being?

Were there cognitive or behavioral consequences to this experience of being treated differently due to a prejudice?   Be specific about what consequences and use material in the text.

       And again from chapter 6:

What do you think would be the most effective way of changing the attitudes and behavior of the people who engaged in the discrimination? How does this relate to the methods discussed in the book for countering the effects of prejudice?

Below, is my assignment:

     I have been overweight almost my entire life; I would say since I was about 5 or 6 years old. My weight has been something that I've struggled with and I was subjected to ridicule from a very young age that continued through my teen and even my adult years, though overt criticism has declined with age. I encountered many typical situations that any overweight kid might encounter due to prejudice and discrimination – perhaps the most common being chosen last for sports or in gym class to participate in any activities that required physical aptitude. But, perhaps the most memorable moment of discrimination occurred when I was 16.

     I was always heavily involved in the music program at my school. I went to a small school and was well-known for being the best vocalist at the time (I even went to college for vocal performance straight out of high school). When we were doing some of the pre-planning for the following years' musical production, one of our choral teachers approached me and told me, “If you want to have a chance at a lead next year, I suggest you lose at least 30lbs. The audience can't relate to an overweight lead involved in a romantic relationship on-stage, it's just awkward.” When audition time came around the following season, I had not lost any weight. I was cast in a minor part, despite being the best vocalist and the best actress (which was admitted by half of the panel which was making casting decisions).

     There are several stereotypes about overweight individuals, such as: laziness, ineptitude, stupidity, sloppiness, etc. But, perhaps the one that was most prevalent here is that, to those who are prejudiced, overweight people are perceived as being universally unattractive and unworthy of love and relationships.

     The type of discrimination being exhibited in this case was denial of an opportunity based on physical appearance: specifically body weight. Tokenism was not present because it was not a case where a gesture was being made to be inclusive of a minority group.

     I believe that the prejudice exhibited in this case was implicit. It was not discriminatory in an overt way, but it was discrimination based on socially accepted stereotypes about overweight individuals and their roles in love and relationships. I was not discriminated against strictly because I was overweight, but because of how the teacher assumed the audience would react given the perceptions that people may carry about overweight individuals.

     I think that the attitudes my teacher held were formed through social learning and by stereotypes perpetuated by mass media outlets. There is little to no representation of overweight individuals in television and film, and when there is representation, it is usually in a way that perpetuates stereotypes of gluttonous, lazy, stupid, ineffectual people with little to no capacity to form real, meaningful relationships. Seeing overweight people in a sexual context is even more rare. These bombardments of messages reinforce our notion that these qualities are the norm for overweight people, and that any overweight person who exhibits different qualities must be an exception to the rule, or must be exhibiting those behaviors situationally.

     This is not a scenario where the teacher's self esteem would have been threatened. However, I believe that the prejudice is a combination of social categorization (“us” vs. “them”) and, on some level, a perceived threat to limited resources. Overweight people are categorized as a group associated with the stereotypes of being lazy, ineffectual, stupid, romantically and sexually undesirable, and clumsy. They are set apart from “normal-weight” individuals who would be seen as the “ingroup” in this particular case. Situational attributions are made for positive outgroup behaviors (behaviors that show an overweight person as being lazy, stupid, etc.) dispositional attributions are made for negative outgroup behaviors in-line with stereotypes, thus reinforcing the stereotype and downplaying “exceptions to the rule”.

     In terms of competing for resources, I believe that there is a perceived threat in this case – particularly when it comes to reproduction and mating. Overweight individuals are seen as less attractive (or, “disgusting”) and less worthy of love or partnership than individuals with more average body-types – meaning that, to the prejudiced individual, the overweight person is seen as less worthy of a relationship than a person within the “ingroup” of an average-weight person. Since there is sexual, reproductive competition in play, the potential partners should always be available to those of the “ingroup” of average weight. I believe that this is the case because the argument of the teacher was that seeing an overweight girl in a lead role that had a romantic element to the part would be awkward, unattractive, and difficult for an audience to relate to.

     My weight has never been an important part of my social identity to me, but more of a social and physical obstacle. I usually have only thought of my weight in a health context, or in the context of social difficulty due to the misconceptions of other people.

     Interpersonal interactions – particularly ones with romantic interests – always made me very conscious of my weight and it presented itself as a stronger part of my identity and lead to insecurity. Personal, individual endeavors, (such as academics) were less affected by this part of my identity because the performance was not seen as being reliant on appearance in any significant way.

     Coping with the differential treatment was done by acting in spite of it, or acting outwardly as if I did not care about the discrimination that took place due to my weight. I participated in things that most girls my size would refuse to participate in – such as multiple varsity sports – and performed regularly as part of musical productions, was involved in extra-curricular activities and student government. I constantly put myself on display as the center of attention, which was something that was not typically done by other overweight peers. I felt like if I acted as if my weight wasn't a big deal to me, that others might not see it as a big deal either – and in many situations, it worked to an extent. I didn't flaunt my weight, or the identity of being “overweight and proud,” but I ignored my weight and pretended that it wasn't an issue and participated in my life in a way I thought that any other “average” person might. In this way, I focused on defining myself on an individual level, looking for ways to set myself apart from my peer group, and attempting to shed the stereotypes associated with it.

     I believe that the discriminatory treatment that I experienced in my youth affected my self-esteem, self-efficacy, and caused self-ideal discrepancy. As I continued through school, and particularly after this specific situation, my self-esteem suffered. I saw myself as unworthy of achievement because of my weight. My self-efficacy was affected because I no longer thought that I was capable of achieving the things that I had previously thought myself capable of. I thought that giving my best would not be good enough to be successful in attaining my goals in college and in a future career. I became more unhappy with the way that I looked, because I had envisioned an ideal self who was more attractive and less overweight than I actually was.

     I made an attribution that I was being treated differently because of prejudice. I thought that this was a prejudice that would be likely to occur in many situations, including my romantic life at the time, and in my career in the future. This affected by well-being by making me feel as if there was a boundary between myself and my goals that seemed unfair and impermeable, and in many ways it sapped me of my ambition and caused me to want to just give up on the big dreams that I had altogether.

     There were behavioral consequences to being treated differently due to prejudice. The negative impact to my self-esteem caused me to doubt my talent and abilities in such a way that made me afraid to put myself in a situation where I would be likely to be criticized again. When I was applying to colleges as a junior and senior, I ended up skipping my scheduled auditions for more prestigious music programs such as Ithaca College and Syracuse University because I feared rejection and no longer believed I was capable of getting into such programs.

     I think that the most effective way to change the attitudes and behavior of people engaging in this type of discrimination would be mass recategorization. Being able to see overweight people in the context of simply being human and realizing that there is the same variation of characteristics and behaviors associated with them would go a long way. Social influence would also be a helpful way of reducing prejudice. If more members of the “ingroup” of average-weight individuals advocated for the rights of overweight individuals – and particularly if this advocation resulted in more normalized representation within mainstream media – I believe that there would be significant decrease in prejudice and discrimination.

References

Baron, R. &  Branscombe, N. (2012). Social Psychology, 12th ed. New York: Allyn and Bacon

My professor left me the following note at the end of her evaluation:


"Heartbreaking journal to read because of the discrimination you endured at the hands of the choral teacher. I'm sorry you had to go through an experience like this as a teen. You should mail her a copy of this journal so that she may think twice about making a remark like this again. If she worked for me and I had learned of her behavior, there would have been a major consequence."

Movie Stuff - LINCOLN (2012)

It's not often that you can claim a movie to "not have a hair out of place," but LINCOLN certainly comes close.  I had absolutely terrible seats (I was in the second row looking straight up at a skewed screen the entirety of the film) and yet it is easily one of the most rewarding viewings I've probably ever had in a theater.  For me, that may not mean much, as I only usually visit the theater a few times a year.  But, if there are more movies like this one waiting for me in 2013, I will definitely be frequenting the theater more often.

Though the film covers a real historical situation, the cinematography (and quite notably the lighting) delivers a level of artistry that I wouldn't normally expect.  Every scene looked like an old oil painting, vivid with color and dramatically lit. It is absolutely breathtaking.  I highly recommend seeing this film in theaters just to get the most out of the visual experience, because it is incredible.

The most impressive thing about LINCOLN is the cast.  Daniel Day-Lewis seems like he was born to play this role.  Tommy Lee Jones was dynamic and hilariously coarse.  Sally Field delivered a gripping portrayal of Mary Todd Lincoln, whose vulnerability comes to a peak in a scene where she is arguing with the President about the future of their son, Robert (played wonderfully by Joseph Gordon-Levitt).  It is one of my favorite scenes in the entire film: the depth of anger and frustration was palpable.  From top to bottom, every single performance exceeded my wildest expectations.  Great movies will usually have one or two stand-out performances, but I could easily list half of the credited actors involved and describe their performances as impeccable.  I haven't seen such a deeply talented cast in a very, very long time. 

I was moved by this film (and it's obviously emotional ending), as was the rest of the audience.  In a packed theater, as the credits began to roll, nobody could bring themselves to leave.  We sat there silently soaking up what we had just witnessed, and paying our respects to the history, the story, and the talent who brought it to life.

Obligatory Introduction

There is only one real purpose for this blog: and that is my own selfish, indulgent need to create something.  My posts will likely range from movie/book/music reviews, to general rants, political commentary, or even photos or videos of anything I create.

I'm not sure where it's going to go -- if anywhere.  I may only share it with select people, I may pimp it out all over social media ... I may never make another post.  This is something I'm doing on a whim ... it is what it is, and I'm perfectly fine with that.